Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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