Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
