Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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