Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
