eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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