I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
