He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Randomize
