all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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