she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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