U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
