Kiss
Puke
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
