Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
