how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
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