So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
