belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
