I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize