you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
