I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
