Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
