oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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