She went from zero to smokin in five shots
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
