Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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