This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
