Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
