Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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