yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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