I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
