The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
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