And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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