My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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