did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
