we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
