Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.