Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
