1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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