rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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