you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.