Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours

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  (818): yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours http://tfl.nu/fxuo
  Replies (9) Good night (1533) Bad night (607)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I think scott just propositioned me for sex

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  (734): I think scott just propositioned me for sex http://tfl.nu/w8hq
  Replies (3) Good night (1073) Bad night (463)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.

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  (608): i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest. http://tfl.nu/jvc2
  Replies (68) Good night (3267) Bad night (596)
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  (631): View more from New York

  the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.

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  (631): the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke. http://tfl.nu/6ulb
  Replies (27) Good night (811) Bad night (3956)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants

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  (720): It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants http://tfl.nu/j8mk
  Replies (8) Good night (981) Bad night (5241)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.

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  (978): If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises. http://tfl.nu/xzxa
  Replies (8) Good night (4081) Bad night (1432)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.

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  (248): Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch. http://tfl.nu/snc7
  Replies (10) Good night (4727) Bad night (1184)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.

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  (778): When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back. http://tfl.nu/pu4u
  Replies (18) Good night (4436) Bad night (2120)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?

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  (330): not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up? http://tfl.nu/smja
  Replies (6) Good night (1132) Bad night (2987)
• Favorite

  (283): View more from Ohio

  He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.

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  (283): He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought. http://tfl.nu/hl8d
  Replies (3) Good night (1776) Bad night (565)
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.

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  (510): but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night. http://tfl.nu/vgwo
  Replies (5) Good night (819) Bad night (1283)
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  (916): View more from California

  I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.

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  (916): I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background. http://tfl.nu/r9ng
  Replies (4) Good night (1285) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE

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  (425): I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE http://tfl.nu/sn9a
  Replies (5) Good night (350) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.

  (310): View more from California

  Please stop calling it that.

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  (323): He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys. (310): Please stop calling it that. http://tfl.nu/s1ci
  Replies (5) Good night (813) Bad night (291)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.

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  (609): I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me. http://tfl.nu/juje
  Replies (3) Good night (428) Bad night (189)

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