WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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