He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
