is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
