Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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