Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
