Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
The cops high fived after they tackled you
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
