I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
