i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
