physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
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i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
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Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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