I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
