your room smells of hookers.
And success
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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