I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
