Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
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